(a few of) Elisabeth Elliot’s Words to Me

Last week I was asked to speak (remotely) to a Bible Study in Bethesda MD on the life of Elisabeth Elliot. I was delighted to know these women had been studying many great servants of the Lord and it was a privilege to be with them and remember some of Elisabeth’s legacy.

Elisabeth Elliot entered “through gates of splendor” to her heavenly Home five years ago. I recall that June morning when her daughter Valerie shared her final moments with me in a phone conversation,  her funeral and burial in Massachusetts; and then when Mike, Val and I visited her grave together one year later (2016) near Boston, singing together “Thine is the Glory…” 

Last year the whole world gained new access to the life of this servant, through Valerie Elliot Shepard’s beautiful new book Devotedly  containing previously unpublished letters and journal entries from her parents Elisabeth and Jim. This work of love and diligence is both beautiful and remarkable. Not only is the writing exquisite (which causes me to deeply mourn the almost lost art of letter-writing and journaling) but the thoughts, struggles and commitment of these two young people inspire no end!


Lucinda and Elisabeth 1977

            Many years ago when I was studying at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, I lived with Elisabeth Elliot as her student lodger. By then she had already written 20 books and was well-known for taking her young daughter, Valerie, to live with Auca Indians in Ecuador – the same ones that had speared her husband, Jim Elliot, and four other missionaries to death. By the time I first heard her speak, at ‘Urbana ’76,’ her second husband, Dr. Addison Leitch, had just died of cancer.


            Though I was a disappointment as a housecleaner (her words, not mine) I did pretty well at my other duties – transcribing Jim Elliot’s journals for her current manuscript (on a typewriter), driving her to the airport for frequent speaking engagements and organizing events in her home. We shared many lively breakfast conversations (yes, we did have differing opinions on a few things), hosted hymn sings and dinner parties, and even shoveled out of the Great Blizzard of ’78. I loved her sense of humor, her stories and enjoyment of parlor games. I don’t remember there being a television in the house at all.

            We were certainly an odd couple – me with my gushy southern type-A personality and her with her reserved New England demeanor and dry wit. But somehow God brought us together in a friendship that lasted 38 years. As I review my journals from that time so long ago I am amazed at how much of my own Life Story and message was shaped by my exposure to Elisabeth’s teachings during that formative season.

            Reading in my journal about a Sunday dinner I cooked for Elisabeth, her mother and sister, and four of my friends, I treasure the notes from that conversation. Jim Glasgow, a seminarian from North Carolina, commented that so many people he admired had gone through great suffering. “Do you feel that’s necessary in order to become a man or woman of God?” he asked Elisabeth.

            That evening I scribbled as much of her answer as I could remember in my journal. “She said ‘yes’ she believed we must know the cross in our own lives — Philippians 3.10 ‘that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and may share His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death…’ That we must suffer for the Lord even though we don’t seek out the suffering, nor do we have anything to do in choosing the fashion it will take. Sometimes this means allowing ourselves to be joyfully inconvenienced, not seeking our own way, but serving others. Daily prayers for another can be an opportunity of laying down our lives for someone else.”

           I remember her warning us that our generation was not prepared to suffer or even be inconvenienced. I wrote “She pointed out that we must learn discipline and submission to authority in order to better be able to submit more wholly to God. Discipline should be exercised in our daily devotions, in our studies and in our love life. We must become responsible for that with which God has entrusted us now so we can be better prepared for all He has in store for us later.”  Do you remember the very first time you heard such powerful and challenging teaching as a young follower of Christ? I was like a sponge, soaking it all in…

            This particular journal entry (October 30, 1977) closed with my own lament “Oh! How can I remember all she said – it was so profound. I can’t possibly do it justice writing it down here. But there are at least 2 basic things I want to begin putting into practice right now:

  1. Discipline in all areas, but especially my devotions and studies.
  2. Daily seeking ways to ‘suffer’ for God through discipleship and serving others.”

                Today I am older than Elisabeth was when I lived with her —  a seasoned mentor, utterly dependent on God’s mercy through all my life’s experiences, and yes, suffering. I am also, by God’s grace, a person He uses to touch others through my writing and speaking. I still find that remarkable – that the Creator and Sustainer of the universe would choose me to have even a small part in helping to further His kingdom.

            I smile as I read the postcard Elisabeth sent me shortly after she married a third time and moved down to Atlanta while I stayed in her Massachusetts home. I had sent her an article of mine which appeared in the seminary newspaper. “…The parable is very good, I think. Perhaps it would be more effective if a wee shorter in the description of your failure, and a little longer on the remedy. You definitely have a flair for writing. Have you tried to do anything for Christian magazines? Spring is lovely in Georgia, isn’t it? Today I get a NOW hairdo to replace the THEN one….E”

            After my graduation a few years later, Elisabeth spoke strongly into my life concerning God’s call and purpose. “Cindy, God has given you a gift of writing and it is your duty to offer it back to Him.” And so I do.

           EEbook Once Elisabeth told me that each of us is given only about two major themes/messages and that everything we speak and write about flows from that core. As I reflect on her life and international influence through her 30 books, Gateway to Joy radio program and many seminars, the messages that resonate most clearly seem to be:

  • SUFFERING – Offering our suffering and circumstances to God, knowing that nothing is wasted – laying it on the altar and asking how we can learn and grow through this.
  • SERVING – Serving others through the discipline of having a my-life-for-yours attitude every time we pray for someone or encounter a God ordained interruption.

           I don’t know if it is written in any of her books but one of the most powerful things I remember her telling me was “Suffering is having what you don’t want and wanting what you don’t have.”  I’m delighted that her final speaking series Suffering is Never for Nothing has also recently been released as a beautiful new book which I highly recommend. 

                        Some years ago Mike and I drove to Boston and took luncheon over to Lars and Elisabeth’s home so that I could say some important things that needed to be said. After all she had told me through the years, I very much needed to tell her what she had meant in my life. This was during her final quiet years and though the conversation was somewhat one-sided, it was precious and special and I was gratified that she seemed to remember me. 

            May I close with the words of a letter Elisabeth Elliot wrote to a very, very young Cindy Secrest back in 1978: “Amy Carmichael of India said ‘all weathers nourish souls.’ It’s true. All situations, all circumstances, all privations and abundances are opportunities to be spiritually nourished – if we respond in faith. This lesson has been laid before me again here. There are things that are not to my liking about the situation, of course. So what! ‘I have learned in whatsoever state I am therewith to be content’ (Philippians 4.11). You are dear to me, Cindy. In the will of the Lord we’ll see more of each other. You are in my prayers – keep me in yours, please. Lovingly, Elisabeth”

Who has had an impact on your life that you remember with gratitude today?

What messages of your own life will people remember long after you are gone?

under the mercy, Lucinda

Please visit the brand new Elisabeth Elliot Foundation site for further information about Elisabeth Elliot and Valerie Elliot Shepard. And look for New York Times best-selling author Ellen Vaughan‘s new authorized biography releasing in September, “Becoming Elisabeth Elliot.” 


“Helping You Choose a Life of Serenity & Strength”

©2020 Lucinda Secrest McDowell

Lucinda Secrest McDowell is a storyteller and seasoned mentor who engages both heart and mind while “Helping You Choose a Life of Serenity & Strength.” She has authored 15 books including “Soul Strong – 7 Keys to a Vibrant Life” and “Life-Giving Choices – 60 Days to What Matters Most.” She writes from “Sunnyside” cottage in New England and shares encouragement at LucindaSecrestMcDowell.com

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  1. Maggie Rowe on July 8, 2020 at 12:17 pm

    Thank you for sharing her legacy as it intersected so strongly with your life, Cindy! What an extraordinary privilege you had to not only know her but to work and live with her.

    • Marcella Charles on July 9, 2020 at 2:17 pm

      This morning I came across a sure gift from the Lord. It was your reflection here. Elisabeth Eliot was a mentor to me, not in the personal way you were privileged to know her but through her books, her speaking and by watching her life. I also had one rare opportunity in the early 90’s, while on a study leave from fulltime campus ministry and doing an MDiv at Gordon-Conwell, to arrange a private meeting with her at her home near the seminary in Massachusetts. It was one of the richest, most profound, most memorable sixty minutes of my life! I asked her some of the deep questions I always wanted to ask her and then I just listened to her. She directed a few questions to me and then listened to me respond. Then I listened some more. I took notes. I admit I was awestruck with her but, moreso drawn to Christ, for he was everything to her. She spoke and ministered to me that day from a deep place of knowing and abiding in Him. I am filled with gratitude to God for the influence Elisabeth Eliot had on my life and ministry. I said sixty minutes because, as you know, she was not one given to ‘chit chat.’ When our time had ended she simply stood up and graciously escorted me to the door. I knew I had been in the presence of greatness that day. She was a woman of God.
      Lucinda, thank you so much for sharing some powerful things you gained from her and also for your update on Valerie’s book. I will have to read it along with the biography by Ellen Vaughan. Blessings on you dear sister. You have truly made my day!

  2. Colette on July 8, 2020 at 1:01 pm

    Hi Cindy thank you for sharing this incroyable journey of your youth with this amazing woman! I have met such a woman in my life and the Love we shared was and still is miraculous and deep. God granted me a new Mom at 18 and I still grieve her … but rejoice and being bless by her life as an example of how Christ wanted for me to become and live my life. Thank you Cokette

  3. Ellie Gustafson on July 8, 2020 at 1:05 pm

    I love the Suffering and Serving concept. Good words to make sense of this bizarre time we’re living in.

  4. Lisa Breglio on July 8, 2020 at 3:22 pm

    Thank you Cindy for sharing .. beautifully written!! Elizabeth Elliots testimony and life is a gift to us all !!

  5. Nancy Smith on July 8, 2020 at 4:13 pm

    OH! Thank you for sharing these reflections. I had to print this post because of the depth of wisdom you received from Elizabeth. This is the 2nd time her last book on”Suffering “has been mentioned to me. I will have to read it soon.

  6. Ellen Lawler on July 8, 2020 at 4:30 pm

    Thank you for sharing this. It is a word I indeed needed today! Blessings always, Ellen

  7. Holli on July 8, 2020 at 10:31 pm

    Exactly what I needed to hear today! Thank you!

  8. Jeanne Zornes on July 9, 2020 at 2:43 pm

    Thank you for this tender and memorable way you honored your mentoring by Elisabeth Elliot. She poured into you, a choice vessel, and now you are blessing us with that part of her that is now YOU.

  9. Maureen Miller on July 10, 2020 at 1:06 pm

    Thank you so much for these words, dear Friend. And thank you for being one who has spoken in to my life in profound ways… always pointing me to Jesus.
    Love you!

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